New psychobabble episode. Watch on Youtube below.

Why INFJs Don’t Want Kids

Hey everyone, it’s Jenny, your existential life coach, and today we’re talking about why many INFJs don’t want kids. Before moving on, a quick reminder: don’t ask people why they don’t have kids. I promise you that they have a good reason (infertility, miscarriage, the list goes on), and that reason is also none of your business. If you ask someone this question, I hope you’re embarrassed by the answer because you honestly deserve it.

It’s not because INFJs are bad parents.
Plenty of INFJs choose to become parents, and their empathetic and nurturing personalities make them great at it. This is nothing against those who do have children. These are just the reasons why some of us choose not to.

1. Kids Are Great, Let's Not Ruin That:

Many INFJs love kids—other people’s kids. We see you parents trudging through the same daily responsibilities every day, and it honestly looks terrible. If we had to do that every day, we would be miserable too. We prefer to continue liking children instead of resenting them.

2. Alone Time Is Sacred:

INFJs need their solitude like they need air and kids are like cute little energy vampires. Alone time, peace, and quiet, a good night sleep are not just things that are nice to have for us, they are deep and essential NEEDs. With the constant demands of parenting, where does one sneak in that precious alone time? We already know the answer: You don’t.

3. Motherhood is Metal:

INFJ women are always thinking 10 steps ahead and that includes the toll motherhood takes on our bodies. It’s seriously a mystery to us why no one seems to acknowledge the absolutely insane levels of havoc motherhood reeks on your body. That’s not to mention the endless doctors' appointments surrounded by strangers who are busy touching, poking and prodding us. Medical trauma is real, hormonal changes are real and it takes YEARS for a mother’s body to return to normal.

4. The World Is an Epic Mess:

This is really not a world we would like to bring children into. The education system is completely broken and designed to create mindless sheeple, but we’re also not going to give up what precious alone time we have left to homeschool our kids. Plus, even if we don’t mess our own kids up, they still end up having to deal with someone else’s evil demon spawns.

5. It’s Our Turn to be Children:

A lot of INFJs are still sorting through our own childhood issues. We were robbed of the time or permission to be children growing up, so now we’re reclaiming that lost time. We’re busy reparenting ourselves and aren’t about to start on another human being. It’s about healing ourselves first—kids can wait or not happen at all.

6. There’s No Help:

Remember when villages helped raise children? Yeah, neither do we. But that’s how it’s supposed to work. We’re supposed to get our exercise organically, because everything is supposed to be walkable. Child care is supposed to be built-in to our society. Not a service you have to drive to and pay for. Wise old elders are supposed to help raise children with knowledge younger parents haven’t acquired yet. On top of this, many INFJs are busy trying to raise wounded immature partners. It might just be that we can't find anyone who's worth breeding with. (I'm not looking. Don't contact me).

INFJs don’t pass on parenting because they’re incapable. They’re actually so smart and capable that they know better. They care more about their hypothetical children than many real parents care for their own real children. If anything, INFJs are too aware, too in tune with the demands and realities—and they’re opting out. If you have a reason I missed, drop a comment on the video. If you liked this episode, help my channel by subscribing and hitting the notification bell. If you don’t like my videos, they’re free. So all you have to do is not watch them… Leaving comments actually boosts the algorithm.

Stay weird. ✌️